There is nothing like the arrival of a sweet bundle of goodness to give one a swift kick in the a##. Reality check. Life until now was easy! Hindsight being 20/20, it's not difficult for me to see how deliciously selfish my life has been to date. My husband and I have been together for nine years now, married for three. Being native New Yorkers, we are accustomed to a fast paced life, which had revolved around a flurry of work, events with friends and family, and our efforts to cultivate our individual interests.
Over the last decade, I’ve been building a career in Fashion. As a young ambitious couple, we understood that our careers necessitated time and dedication, but it came at a cost. So we started Date Night, every Wednesday, dealer’s choice. No excuses. Every other day was his and mine to do what we wished, whether that meant late nights at the office, or dinner and drinks with friends. We had a fairly independent lifestyle for a married couple, which is just the way we liked it. When we made the decision to start a family we knew it would change our lives forever. When I was pregnant people asked if I was afraid of delivering the baby. My answer was always the same, that part doesn't frighten me. Women were built for that. What made me nervous was uprooting the lifestyle we had become so accustomed to.
As my pregnant self got bigger and bigger, we went from dinners in trendy restaurants, to burgers and a movie, to take out and pay-per-view. The latter of which was awesome for me and for my then tiny bladder (thank you DVR and the PAUSE button). On a gorgeous sunny day last Spring, our baby girl was born. There is nothing like the moment I held her for the first time. It was visceral and wondrous and surreal all at the same time. We were both so fragile. Four months (and 0 date nights later) it's time to get back reality. I started back up at the office again about a month ago. I was just as anxious to get back to a realm in which I have a semblance of control, as I was to leave my little one. In those short months we were together we became inseparable. A month back into the swing of things at work, and I am still missing her dearly. I could go on for days about how adorable she is, or how each milestone (even the tiny ones) is so precious I can't even stand it. But I promised myself we would keep these moments for ourselves!
The inspiration for this site came from a desire to explore the idea that we are more than more than the sum of our parts. It was never quite as evident as it is to me now. I was a wife and a workaholic, a fashion devotee, a film junkie, a romantic and idealist at heart. Until The baby came along, my life was completely under my control. The good, the bad and the ugly were a direct result of the decisions I made for myself. There was no one who truly depended on me. Now there is this wonderful little person who needs me to survive, for whom I must be the best version of myself. It is a powerful transformative truth. Admittedly, there have been a few bleak moments in the past few months where I could not see myself anymore—not as I had defined myself anyway. As I try to find balance between the selves that once made me whole, it feels like a time for reinvention. I have been moved by the experience of motherhood in a way I never could have anticipated. The depths of compassion and love I’ve felt in these short months have given me a new perspective. And although I haven’t quite mastered this thing yet, (not sure if one ever does, really) adventures are richer in good company.